my body can’t take this for too long. 

i still have to sustain and survive for 2 weeks– whilst keping up the planning, working and doing everything as i would “normally” do.

you just woke up and messaged me. 

some of my fears stop for a second as i just think of you.

i say that i miss you as my soul aches for some comfort– for any kind of reassurance

i can’t stop stimming hard. my legs hurt from moving them without end and my body agonizes from the amount of anxiety that looms over my thoughts every waking hour.

 . . .

.. each hour on the clock feels impossible to survive.

it’s not even been two days and it feels like i’ve been awake for over a week. 

i just..

.. i want help.

.. i need help.

but what?  .. how?

this feels like i’m leaning over the edge of the abyss and i’m scared that the fall will hurt.

..

 fuck.

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